February 2016 – make today happy

Day 100: my 100th happy day

Being grateful for reaching 100 days of happy:

I’ve made it! I’ve done it!

100 happy days!!

WooHoooo!!!

I’m so thrilled to be writing my 100th happy day (and I have to confess I’ve been stringing it out a little bit as I didn’t want it to come to an end!).

I set out “to encourage myself to look for and write about something that has made me happy every single day”. And to be honest, once I started looking I’ve found it surprisingly easy to find something to be happy about.

In fact, most days it’s hard to choose which one to write about!

And that’s not meant to sound like my life is like a bed of roses. It certainly isn’t.

What I’ve realised is that we all have things around us that can make us happy – if only we allow it to.

And it really is the everyday little things.

For me it’s a beautiful sunrise or sunset, the melodic sound of birdsong, a soul stroll in nature, a tree blowing in the wind, a delicious meal, a hug with my mum, connecting with a friend, a yummy yoga session, playtime with my nephews, getting crafty, and so many more.

Perhaps the biggest lesson I’ve learnt throughout this is that happiness is an attitude: it is a choice we make every single day.

Even when I’m feeling crappy, wiped out or a little blue, or all three at once, as soon as I look for something to be grateful for, it instantly lifts my spirits.

It really is as simple as that.

Of course there are days when I’ve felt disgustingly crappy and to be completely honest, I haven’t felt like looking for something to cheer myself up. I’ve chosen to wallow in it, and that’s ok. As long as I acknowledge it and accept that it’s my choice.

I used to beat myself up for having ‘negative’ feelings, but now I’m trying to embrace both the light and the shadows. They’re all part of life and what makes me who I am, who we all are.

I know I need to honour how I’m feeling, as pushing it away can become pretty toxic. So now, when I feel awful, I try not to fight it. Instead I try to accept it and allow it and let myself feel it, and to trust that this too shall pass. For it will.

Of course, I’ll continue to have my blips and feel rubbish and lose my happy, and that’s ok. I can’t expect myself to be happy every single moment of every single day, so why beat myself up when I’m not? And as long as I’m aware of this and know that I can chose to be happy is the key.

Another thing I’ve learnt is that happiness isn’t a switch that once it’s on it never goes off: it’s a daily practice. It takes effort, which at times is not easy, but it’s so worth it.

So now I’ve reached the end of my 100 days of happy project, what next?

To be honest, I’m still not sure. But I’m really excited do see what’s around the corner.

I have lots of ideas floating around in my head which I can’t wait to explore and put into action. But as I’ve learnt with the rollercoaster nature of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, I have to take each day, each hour, as it comes: slowly and surely.

And I completely trust that when the time is right, I will take the next step. And then the next.

In the meantime, I will continue to write about finding the happy in the everyday little things, just without the numbers as I feel I need to leave the 100 days as it is. So my new posts will be under a new heading: more happy days.

I can’t not mention the positive impact my kindness acts have had on my wellbeing. It’s been truly amazing and life-changing. Being kind really does benefit the giver as well as the receiver, and for that I’m truly grateful.

And I never expected the incredible response I’ve had from others – the reaction and feedback from some of the receivers, the interest from my local newspaper and radio station, and all the wonderful comments from lovely you.

They’ve been a lovely bonus.

I have so many ideas on how to continue my kindness mission, and I’m really excited to be delving into this a lot more going forward. But all in good time and I will definitely be writing about them when the time is right.

And most of all, I’d like to say a huge big THANK YOU to everyone who has visited my blog, I’m so thankful and it’s always so lovely to see you. And I am ever so grateful for my lovely subscribers, THANK YOU. I get so excited when I see your comments and appreciate every single one. I always feel such a thrill and a deep sense of gratitude when a new subscriber signs up. You are all AMAZING. THANK YOU!

So with this in mind, my happy for today is being for reaching 100 days of happy.

Day 99: My kind Valentine

Being kind by leaving love-filled goodie bags on car windscreens in the hospital car park:

Happy Valentine’s Day! And Happy International Random Act of Kindness Week!

So why not combine the two, me thinks!!

How about some Valentine’s Day Kindness Bags filled with love-themed goodies?

And being joined by my helpful nephew Callum, I have all the ingredients for the sweetest Valentine’s Day EVER!!

I’ve been planning this ever since my Random Act of Christmas Kindness. One of my favourite kindness acts so far, I loved choosing what to put inside my festive goodie bags and it gave me such pleasure leaving them on car windscreens at my doctor’s surgery.

But most of all I was incredibly moved by a response I received from a lovely lady who received one of these bags (see the comments section if you’d like to read it).

So the day is finally here, hooray!.

And I’m over-the-moon that my seven-year-old nephew Callum wants to help me. I love what a big heart he has and how his teacher is always commenting on how kind and helpful he is.

So earlier this morning we spread our loot across my bed, and had fun packing our 20 kindness goodie bags.

Into each clear bag, we popped: a red foil-wrapped chocolate heart, a mini packet of Love Heart sweeties, a mini chocolate bar, a highlighter pen, some heart stickers, a handful of heart-shaped jewels, and a feather or two.

We wrote kindness messages on my Kindness Cards. Callum carefully writing: You are amazing, and adding his name and age on a few. So sweet. And we also included a ‘You Are Loved’ card I’d made using one of my favourite nature photos I took last year, with a little explanation about our Random Act of Kindness on the reverse.

Excited and ready for action, we drove down to the City Hospital and parked up.

Although it was freezing, our hearts were warmed as together we placed our kindness bags on the car windscreens.

We even had the chance to give someone one of our kindness bags face-to-face: we spotted a lady heading into the hospital and ran across to hand-deliver a goodie bag. She seemed really happy to receive it.

We hope that when the owner/s returned to their cars after their appointment or visit or work-shift, they will be surprised.

And we really hope our little act of kindness will make a few people smile and feel happy, especially on this love-filled day.

Last week, I told the Nottingham Post about our little Valentine’s adventure, and we were interviewed and snapped by our city’s newspaper while in the midst of our good deed. Once the feature goes out, I will post the link here:

We then celebrated with a trip to our local Costa for a well-deserved sugar-loaded treat!

What really warms my heart is that Callum wants to take a kindness goodie bag with him into school next week for his ‘show and tell’. My heart is so happy to think that this small act of kindness may help inspire this younger generation to continue the ripple effect of kindness.

What a brilliant way to celebrate the start of International Random Act of Kindness Week!

Now back home, I’m shaking with exhaustion and about to switch-off and have a long soak in a yummy Epsom salt bath.

So with this in mind, my happy for today is being kind by leaving love-filled goodie bags on car windscreens in the hospital car park.

ps if you have received one of our Valentine’s Day Kindness Goodie Bags, we’d really LOVE to hear from you in the comments below. If you’d prefer me not to publish your comment on the blog, please let me know.

Day 98: Friends

Being grateful for my friends:

Friends.

Just thinking about them makes me smile.

I’m sure you’ll agree that friends enrich our lives. We support and inspire, console and motivate, have each other’s back, and believe in each other.

Whether it’s a giggle over something silly, or a pour-your-heart-out kind of chat, friends comfort each other during tough times, and are there to celebrate the good times.

And what’s more, they know you and still love you!

I feel so blessed to have had some amazing friends throughout my life so far. I am truly grateful for every single one: longstanding and new, young and young-at-heart, near and far, lost and found.

Friends can really feel like family: they’re the family we choose for our ourselves.

I came to realise this even more so having lived in various places around the world. Having to start from scratch quite a few times, it’s not easy and can be pretty lonely at first. But slowly and surely, friendships form and blossom.

But then it’s heartbreaking when one of us – which usually happens to be nomadic ole me – moves on and we have to say goodbye.

So that’s why I say, thank goodness for technology!

I am forever grateful to be able to stay in touch via Skype and FaceTime. I don’t think I’ll ever get over how incredible is it to sit and have a face-to-face catch up over a cuppa with a friend on the other side of the country or the world!

And while I’m not a huge user of Facebook, I’m glad to have it so I can have a quick scroll through friends’ pages now and again to see what they’ve been up to.

I have to confess, I used to be doubtful how you could make real true friends through social media. But thankfully my eyes, and heart, have been opened thanks to an amazing daily gratitude app. This like-minded community filled with kind-hearted, happy souls make me smile every day and I’ve formed some truly special life-long friendships. Even though we haven’t met in person yet – and I stress the yet as I know it will happen – I know that these friendships are just as real and just as true.

While new friendships are all shiny and exciting, I’m really sad to have lost connection with friends from the past, as we both moved on or grew apart. But I’ve come to accept that this is part of life.

As with any relationship, they can be difficult and challenging at times, but hopefully you can work through it together and come out stronger.

Sadly, there are some friends we have to let go of, or they let go of us. No matter how painful it is when this happens, I try and remind myself to be grateful for all that we’ve shared together. And whenever I think of them to remember to smile and send them love ♡.

Having Chronic Fatigue Syndrome makes it frustratingly difficult to stay in touch and keep friendships going. As much as I want to connect, the nature of my symptoms make it a challenge.

It’s safe to say I’m reliably unreliable when it comes to making plans for a get-together be it in person or via technology. I find I have to reluctantly cancel planned chats at the last minute, due to not feeling well enough. And this is really upsetting and I never feel great about it.

But my friends are always in my thoughts and in my heart, and I hope they know that. I hope once I’m well enough, we can reconnect and make up for lost time.

I just love how great friendships are those where you can simply pick up where you left off, even though you haven’t spoken for a while.

And I know that we are always there for each other. After all, that’s what friendship is all about, isn’t it.

So with this in mind, my happy for today is being grateful for my friends.

Day 97: Colouring in

Being mindful while colouring in:

One of the best things I added to my healing tool kit last year, was colouring in.

I even remember how I first heard about ‘art therapy’ aka colouring in for adults. It was featured on a TV show around a year ago as a way of reducing stress and anxiety.

I remember it so clearly, how it was one of those lightbulb moments, where my whole being (and inner child) shouted out: “What a brilliant idea! I want to do that.”

I couldn’t wait for the next time I was in the city, when I could pop into the book shop to buy my first adult colouring book.

A few days later I was excitedly clutching my first purchase and couldn’t wait to get back home to begin what has become one of my favourite mindfulness practices.

I am seriously hooked.

As the activity has grown in popularity and adult colouring books are still topping the best seller charts, my portfolio of colouring books and pencils has grown exponentially too.

I love the process of choosing which illustration I’m going to colour in; I get all my lovely books out and see which one I’m drawn to that day. I have such a great selection to choose from: mantras and expressions, nature-focused images, soothing mandalas, and even a book centred around one of my favourite seaside cities, Brighton.

A brilliant tip I heard early on was to photocopy the picture I’m going to colour in. This means that I can enjoy colouring in my fave image again at a later date. It also means that I can put the finished artwork on my wall, which I tend to do if it’s a mantra. And the anal part of me does it just in case I don’t like my colour choice and I can start again (which I haven’t had to do so far!). Win! Win! Win!

I love choosing the colours too and am mindful of not getting stressed about which colours to use, as this kind of defeats the whole object! Sometimes I like to pick a colour theme: seaside shades, the bright happy colours of India, variations on one or two colours, or a complete experimentation. I sometimes like to play lucky dip and whatever colour comes out of my tin is the one I use for the next bit.

I find colouring powerfully healing. It only takes a few moments before I feel myself forgetting about everything else and relaxing into it. And I just love how it helps keep my mind focused on the present moment.

I’m so thankful that this fun activity with its therapeutic and soothing qualities has made such a comeback: love live adult colouring in!

So with this in mind, my happy for today is being mindful while colouring in.